I am using violence

If you have made a decision to stop using violence and abusive behaviour on your partner or others in your family, Shine would like to do what we can to support you. Changing old habits and behaviours is hard, but it is usually easier if you are getting support from family and friends, or from Shine or other community organisations.

People can change – but if you want to change, you will need to be determined and, as much as possible, surround yourself with people who will support that change, and challenge you when they see old, unhelpful behaviours. 

Attending a stopping violence programme has really helped a lot of men and women to change their lives. Shine’s No Excuses stopping violence programme for men runs groups in Auckland. Shine’s programme and most other similar programmes elsewhere in the country strive to provide a welcoming and engaging atmosphere where men can talk openly with other men and facilitators about their use of abuse and violence. Our experience is that most men who abuse their partners will not change if they are not willing to accept responsibility for their own behaviour and talk openly about it. 

Read more about Shine’s No Excuses stopping violence programme for men

You can ring our Helpline 0508-744-633 to find a programme near you or even if you just want to talk to someone and talk through your options. Another helpline option is 0800 Hey Bro, run 24/7 by He Waka Tapu.

Or you may want to look at the National Network of Stopping Violence Services website to find a programme near you; many stopping violence programmes throughout the country are listed on this website. 

One of the programmes listed on this website is a stopping violence programme for women offered by the Inner City Women's Group in Auckland.